Lately I have been chatting with some people who read my blog (thanks for dropping by, you guys!). It seems that I've piqued some people's interests with my situation and, well, my general perspective on this guy to guy thing.
To begin with, I've never had any relationship with another guy and I don't claim to know much about starting or sustaining one. I'm new.
But the thing is, in many ways, I'm a little idealistic as I venture out into this field. See, I'm not and don't intend to be a player, and I don't go about looking for someone just to share carnal pleasures with. I'm all for a good, honest relationship.
People warn me about "typical" guys of my age. Im 24. I warned against guys who'd just break my heart, the kind who sleeps around and looks for "exciting things because, hell, life is short and we're still young so we gotta enjoy life!"
Okay, question. Are you fucking for real? Is this really the typical "PLU" (thanks for the term, Chris)? I mean, seriously. Is a monogamous guy really a rarity? Because if it is, then my chances of trying out a guy to guy relationship runs really thin then! I don't ever intend to date someone- guy or girl- who's into an "open" relationship. It's ridiculous. It hasn't got any real meaning and it's just headed for big trouble. I have problems understanding why a person wouldn't want to invest time, energy and emotions on that one person that he or she loves. I also have a difficult time understanding how a person would just want to keep playing around, those who want nothing but fuck buddies. Lately I've been thinking about re-assessing my priorities. Maybe I'm better off with a girl after all.
When I say I'd like to be in a monogamous relationship, I don't mean wearing a polka-dot duster and settling down like some old couple in Pleasantville. Come ON, it's not like I'm saying I wanna get married when I say I'd like a serious boyfriend.
Where do you find sane guys like these? Not G4M, I've been told, because according to some, most people there are just after hook-ups and one-night stands.
Is there hope? Coz you know, I really still believe in love.
Help, you guys?
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4 comments:
Hi Benz. I’ve asked myself the same question after what happened to me with The Guy. Why are guy-to-guy relationships so disposable to some people? Why are there guys who seem to think that they are missing a lot on life if they get tied to a serious relationship? Why am I so serious about relationships anyway? Is there something wrong with me or is there something wrong with them? What is the “typical twenty something guy” anyway: the dog who sleeps around, partying like an animal or the guy with trappings of naivety and youthful excitement about love? I guess it boils down to the fact that there are guys who are relationship material and there are fleeting fancies. So I think it’s a matter of choosing the one that’s right for you. The Guy (I will not give him the benefit of being called my ex. The “relationship” was null and void from the start.) was right about one thing. He is not and will not the one for me. I am for long-term serious relationships. I’m the kind that will hazard to dream about spending tomorrow until God-knows-when with someone. I am lunatic, crazy, obsessed about love. I have big dreams and big dreams have to be shared with someone special, not with a stray dog. I deserve better.
It’s so hard learning about the dynamics of relationships hands-on. If you don’t want to get hurt, don’t try learning at all. But the fun of it starts there. Pucha, this comment is turning out to be a separate blog entry all together. Hahahahaha. Sorry if I got carried away. Passion is a very hard habit to break.
ease up, kid. it's too early to play bitter since you've only just started and you've been on what? two dates and a quick f*ck? not enough to be bothered by conclusions... =)
there are a lot of serious guys out there (and not just serious guys because they are ugly and undate-able). you just have to keep your eyes open and be patient.
remember, the ones who rush and who want too much, too soon tend to scare off possible candidates.
it's good to be idealistic... especially if you remember that you're being idealistic and remind yourself that the ideal is a model of reality, not reality itself. otherwise, you'd be chasing not a dream but a fantasy. a beautiful, painful fantasy.
ok lang yan, boss. you're doing fine.
Hi there Benz. I discoverd your blog from Juon and it seems that you are a bit confused right now. Let's just say that I echoed your sentiments five years ago. You have to understand that even in heterosexual relationships, temptations exists. Monogamy is subject to trials from time to time. You know what, the real test of how strong your relationship is that no matter what happens you end up in each other's arms no matter what life throws at you. In my five years of being a PLU. four years of it is with someone I call my own. :)
Hi Benz, i just discovered your blog from manilagayguy...so i hope you wont mind me running through...Ü well, i must say that you have to keep that faith, there is always someone for everyone, good things comes to those who waits...and true that, never ever drop on a webbie such as G4M its the craziest thing to do, someone once said this to me, never let your self find a date on the net...its pathetic. And i concurÜ
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