I'm gay. At least I think I am. Sometimes I think it's just a phase... but most of the time I'm just one confused pup.
I've already had sex with both sexes. With the girls, it's cool and I like it. With the guy (yes, singular), I was a "top" and it felt... weird. And dirty. Maybe I'm just bisexual, but when I think about the long term, I kind of imagine myself with a guy in some kind of domestic partnership. That's why I think I'm gay. Discreetly gay— my friends don't know. But I think some of them suspect, though.
I'm 24, running on twenty-five in just a few months. I'm not getting younger! You know what I'd like? A boyfriend. I get all warm inside just thinking about it. But the problem about being discreet is you get too paranoid you almost never give yourself a chance. But now I'd like to give myself that chance. I think I'd want to start dating guys. *blush* Haha, jeezuz.
I live in Makati, Philippines in an apartment that I share with some friends. I like to travel around the country and go to nice beaches. I'm friendly, but not too much. I don't have any gay friends so you can only imagine how close I am to losing my mind having no one who, you know, understands. But I'm no drama queen, I take on life with a strong head (and heart).
I keep another blog, a regular one, but Venturing Out is special. It's the real me talking.
Will you be listening?
2 comments:
hey! thanks for reading my blog! i'll read yours din :D
Hey. You know that place that you are in can be a little tricky. Being gay and not being out at 24 can be hard. This is going to be a very presumptuous unsolicited advice but I venture to let it out just the same. I know how exciting it could be to meet someone and fall in love for the first time, especially when the urge to have a boyfriend nags you often. But I suggest that when the time comes when you THINK you are in love, you take your time and think about it a hundred times before you make it official. I just came off a relationship with somebody in the same position as you are and it ended tragically, at least for me. Although from what I read in your later posts, you don't seem to be anything like him, flighty and unsure. I think it's important that you be sure of yourself first, what you really want, and that you are absolutely certain that what you feel is love for the person and NOT LOVE of LOVE itself. It doesn't pay to be reckless with your heart. And don’t harass yourself with a deadline. Just enjoy the ride.
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